HOW TO PREPARE YOURSELF FOR DELIVERY

Change your mindset

It’s often been said that the only thing scarier than death is speaking in public. A few years ago, a study was done, to establish people’s greatest fears. Interestingly, speaking in public came up tops, followed closely by the fear of dying. As comedian Jerry Seinfeld once commented, “this means that if you are at the funeral, the person giving the eulogy would rather be in the coffin!”

Believe it or not, Winston Churchill, who was widely believed to be the world’s greatest orator, apparently suffered from stage fright in the early days! So if you too are anxious about public speaking – seek comfort in the fact that you’re not alone! Believe me when I say that you’re your own worst critic when it comes to speaking in public. If you change your attitude from “What if I make a fool of myself?” to “What if I really WOW them”, you’re already on the right path to achieving a more positive mindset. Remember that it’s YOUR day: You’re surrounded by all the people who mean something to you, along with those who love you, and they’re all excited to hear what you have to say.

Time yourself

How many times have you reflected upon a wedding, thinking that the venue, food and décor were stunning, but the speeches were way too long and decidedly boring? I’ll bet you wouldn’t want your own wedding to be remembered for its dreadful speeches! To ensure this doesn’t happen, it’s critical that everyone who is asked to speak is given a strict time allowance, and encouraged to trim the content of their speeches to fit their allocated time. As the bride or groom, or parent of the latter, you should practice your delivery by timing yourself, and if you find yourself running way over time, some merciless editing is required!

This is where it helps to have input from a professional speech writer. When I review the first draft of a client’s speech, I am able to discern exactly where it’s long-winded, how several sentences can be condensed into one, which words or phrases are redundant and which elements don’t serve to drive the narrative. This is what I mean by editing, tweaking and structuring your speech – three critical elements that will enable you to express yourself
succinctly, simply and sincerely. Most people struggle with this, and unfortunately, it results in boring, rambling and often self-indulgent speeches that take over the wedding and run way over time!

Practice in front of the mirror

Practice saying your speech until you’re familiar with the content and which points need to be emphasised. When you’re feeling reasonably confident, record yourself delivering it on your cell phone. This gives you an opportunity to see what you look like, and hear the way you’re coming across. Upon review, you’ll be able to pick up whether you’re doing anything distracting, looking down too often, rushing through it like a bullet train or trundling along in a monotonous voice etc.

Practice with a friend

Another good idea is to rehearse with a friend. Ask your friend for honest feedback: “Am I speaking loudly enough, clearly enough, talking too quickly, or too slowly?” Ask questions like, “Are you able to easily follow what I am saying – does it all make sense? Am I using ‘erm’…… ‘I’m like….. ‘you know ……‘anyway’ …. ‘or whatever too often?” Encourage your friend to give you honest feedback, and be open-minded enough not to regard it as criticism, but rather as helpful advice!

Power of the pause

Don’t underestimate the power of a pause. Remember that while you may be familiar with the contents of your speech, your audience will be hearing your thoughts and ideas for the first time and they need time to digest them. Pausing not only also allows you to catch your breath, but it also gives you a moment to remember what comes next.

Overcoming stage fright

Does it help to picture your audience naked? While it’s often been said that this will help to boost your confidence, and it’s a fun idea, true confidence comes not from how you picture them, but how YOU picture yourself, what YOU have to say, and how YOU present it. So make your nervousness work for you, because being nervous puts you on your toes. Tell yourself that you don’t have to be perfect, and make a joke about it to ease the tension, you can make a joke about being nervous. For example, “I thought that writing my final exams/or going for my driver’s license were nerve-wracking, but this moment makes that seem like a doddle!”

Wrapping up your gift

If you’re familiar with your text and you can share it reasonably fluently without your dog or
friend choosing to walk out of the room mid-way, you’re probably ready to speak! Therefore, the number of people watching you on the day shouldn’t matter – in fact, their very presence should make you feel extra pumped as you step up to the podium with a speech you can’t wait to deliver! Always remember that the greatest gift you can give to your audience is a heart-warming speech that’s engaging, entertaining and beautifully delivered!

If you would like my professional input on writing and /or delivering what is likely to be the most important speech you’ll ever have to make, contact
Toby on + (27) 83 949 5579
COPYRIGHT – Toby Shenker    www.bestspeechever.co.za  2022

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